The philanthropist

In the spirit of giving I present to you

Completely Inappropriate  gifts

• Wii’s to a family of amputees.
  The look upon the children’s face as the receive their new Wii will be gratifying enough. To watch them fumble the Wii mote while playing Wii boxing would guarantee enough hilarities for it’s own cable program on Japanese T.V.

• Mp3 players for the deaf.
  Everyone I ask always says they want a new Ipod Nano. So why not bring music to the deaf. Just make sure to point out how much it cost and that you can’t return it.

• Sudoku for the mentally handicapped.
  I don’t know about you but I am a Sudoku fanatic, and I think the mentally handicapped or the politically incorrect “People who wear Mickey Mouse T-shirts” would most appreciate the genius of the Sudoku game. They may not be able to do it but at least they can make paper airplanes out of them. The paper that they’re printed on also has some nutritional value so don’t worry if they decide to eat them.

And the rest:

• Mini-put passes for the blind.
  Not good if you have many windows.
  
  
• Hockey sticks for African Americans
  I’m going to get in trouble for that one.
  
  
• Grand Theif Auto for Bill O’Reilly
  Violence in videos games? Shud up.

• Trampolines for osteoporosis sufferers.
  The cracking noise would be priceless.

• Belgium Chocolates for the diabetic.
  Tell them they’re sugar free.

• Caribians cruise for titanic survivors.
  Leonardo Dicaprio sucked in that.

• Rock climbing for Priapism sufferers.
  Fun but painful to watch.

• Call of duty 3 for traumatized war vets.
  Make sure to turn up the sound on your HDTV

• Lawn Darts for the blind.
  If you hear screams in the other room it’s just the noise they make through the air

• An Xbox 1 for Bill Gates.
  The look on his face would be something that even Bill Gates couldn’t buy.

• Slip and slide for people in wheel chairs.
  They could of course lay down and be slid but that would ruin it.

• Seal skin coat for Pamela Anderson.
  Baby seals if you can manage.

Thanks to Melonmonkey for the Xbox suggestion.
Merry Christmas everyone.

Track of the hour: The Strokes – On the other side